I received an unpleasant comment to a post on LinkedIn yesterday that left me wondering about kindness, compassion and especially non-judgment.
The post was a funny meme about needing coffee, harmless and innocuous. Many of you know I am a bit of a coffee junkie and often post funny memes and photos about the subject.
A woman took offence at the post, which is her right. She felt it inappropriate given the current times we are living in. But what shocked me, was not that she was offended but that she ended her comment insinuating that Karma would punish me for it.
When I read her comment, I had a moment of anger, then hurt, then sadness. I took a breath and watched my reaction, and I let it go. You can not control another person's response. If she found it offensive, then that is about her. My sadness relates to the Karma comment and her belief that because of this one post, Karma would come back to bite me.
How little she understands. There is a saying 'a little knowledge is a dangerous thing', perhaps this is an example of that. She sees Karma as punishment and judgement, debt e.t.c instead of the understanding that it is about 'cause and effect' and non-judgment.
How to deal with someone who is offended, simple don't deal with them - be kind; extend them compassion, even though they do not extend it to you. Do not judge their actions as they have judged yours.
The woman didn't know that I pre-schedule 80% of my posts six months or more in advance. She doesn't not about my situation and what I am dealing with and how self-isolating is affecting me. She did not know that I am doing my best, trying to figure it out; juggle many plates at once. Why would she?
I had already had a quick look at my upcoming posts and removed one that I felt was untimely. However, I didn't feel the coffee post was an issue. I hope to keep reviewing the scheduled posts over the coming weeks and being sensitive, where I can be. But I need to be kind to myself and not judge myself for not having it all done already.
The pandemic has caused a lot of fear and panic; it is bringing the worst out in some people and the best out in many more. But fear affects people in different ways - for this woman, it appears to have triggered offence.
As we all spend more time at home, away from what we regard as our regular lives, it will lead us to or perhaps force us to, look at ourselves and self-reflect. For some that will create growth, but for some, it will trigger more fear as they do not want to look. They need our compassion.
This virus offers us a chance to grow, to step into non-judgment of ourselves and others; to treat to our fellow humans - kindness, compassion and understanding if we take the opportunity.
To the woman who wrote the comment, I wish you well. To anyone else who is offended by any of my posts, I ask for your compassion and understanding. For myself, I am grateful for the insight she gave me that led me to write this piece.
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